Problems in a Relationship (A1)

    Speaking of a relationship, it is without a doubt a complicated and subtle connection that links people together. To build a relationship is easy, via a small talk or a nod, a connection has been formed. However, to manage a relationship is not a simple task, especially to keep it in a good condition at most of the time. Hence, we might ask, what is the definition of a good relationship?

    Life is composed of ups and downs and so does a relationship, comprising of both criteria. Everything comes with pros and cons and so frictions are inevitable. To be frank, problems and catalyst of intimacy in a relationship could be traced back to the same root. That is, problem can change into catalyst and catalyst can actually become problem, too. It depends on how we manage the relationship. Before jumping into the ways to manage a relationship, why not take a minute to evaluate the problems in a relationship?

    To me, the problems in a relationship could be categorized into three major parts. The first and the core problem why a conflict will arouse is the lack of understanding. As we all know, the same coin has two sides. Unless we comprehend the whole story, we are just grasping a tip of an iceberg, missing the other part, which may play an important role in the story. Although it seems to be a straightforward common sense that we should recognize the whole story before drawing into a conclusion, unfortunately, we often fail to abide by this rule, having our own bias towards the event and blaming others for the mistake. That is the fuse of a crevice in a relationship.

    The second common problem is the lack of communication. After we know what happened, once we miss this important process--- communication, a relationship would deteriorate badly. Communication is an extremely pivotal aspect in a relationship, bringing about either the opposite or negative result. Through communication, we could not only have a deeper recognition of the whole event but also get to know the person better. By and large, we understand more about this relationship and thus know how to manage it properly.

    The third one and in my opinion, the most crucial one is the lack of tolerance. Having the ability to tolerate the counterpart in a relationship is a must. Now and then, we would encounter circumstances that could not be perfectly balanced; in other words, benefit of either party would be deprived of. As a consequence, we have to learn to give in sometimes so that the next time we are trapped in the same situation, empathy could be expected. By putting ourselves into the other person’s shoes, we would realize why the person copes with the matter in a certain way on the spot.

    To sum up, a relationship could be easy to handle if we bear these rules in mind. They could turn out to be either a catalyst or a problem in a relationship. It is all up to us!